I have learned over the years that the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others and the joy is manifolds.
From the Tao: The way is a limitless vessel; Used by the self, it is not filled by the world; it cannot be cut, knotted, dimmed or stilled; Its depths are hidden, ubiquitous and eternal; I don’t know where it comes from; it comes from nature.
The soul body plus the essence of the soul, Parashakti and Parasiva, together equals the totality of the soul. The essence of the soul is being Siva and the soul body is becoming Siva. The soul body is maturing, growing. We suffer until we learn to control our body, mind and emotions achieving imperturbability even if we find out the world is going to end tomorrow. Calmness is a platform for meditation.