I have learned over the years that the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others and the joy is manifolds.
From the Tao: The way is a limitless vessel; Used by the self, it is not filled by the world; it cannot be cut, knotted, dimmed or stilled; Its depths are hidden, ubiquitous and eternal; I don’t know where it comes from; it comes from nature.
The letter "Ya" in the Panchakshara Mantra, Namasivaya, stands for the soul. Bodhinatha uses the Panchakshara Mantra to show how the soul is initially drawn by Siva's veiling grace, which leads the soul to maturity through experience in the world. Then comes Siva's revealing grace. When we've had enough of the world, Siva's grace pulls us toward God. The mantra also has the simple, two-syllable form. Si- Reflecting on God the Transcendent Absolute, Va-God as the All Pervading Consciousness